Welcome to The Squeeze.

The Squeeze is committed to bringing you a bundle of American culture featuring the nation’s top headlines as well as local stories while ensuring all the facts are generally accepted and pretty much correct.

Meet Graeme.

That’s me! I served as Editor-in-Chief of the original project which ran as a local magazine until I moved it online in an effort to stop losing money. Now I publish very serious articles like Trump Clarifies New Ballroom Just Going To Be A Place For His Nuts To Hang Out and Pumpkin Spice Fiends Awaken here every month.

Older pieces include Bedridden Elder Only Wishes His Screen Time Had Been Higher and De-Extinction Scientists Are Bringing Back Exciting Ways To Get Torn To Shreds.

Occasionally I submit pieces like We Must Support the President’s Right to Summon Ancient Eldritch Horrors to Chortle.

My friend Halley who worked on the original project also still publishes here sometimes. She has written great articles like Terrorist Toddler Taken To Detention Center For Saying “Goo Goo Gaza” and Trend Prediction: Self Immolation.

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